I don't know if I have mentioned it before on the blog, but in addition to everything else (cancer, diabetes, arthritis, ingrown toenails, whatever...) I've also got a bad case of sleep apnea. Really bad - like I stop breathing 35 to 40 times an hour when I'm sleeping, and my pulse ox dips down into the low 80s. But since I've lost a bunch of weight since the last time they tested me, they're going to test me tomorrow and make sure that the settings are still right.
So, basically, they hook me up with a bunch of electrodes (including gluing them into my hair - I hate that part), put me in a room with infrared cameras and then tell me to get a good night's sleep. No husband, no puppies, no water bed, just me alone with my electrodes. Really not looking forward to this - especially since I've been having an increasing issue with bladder control, thanks to Hank sitting on top of it. But I figure I can just not drink anything after noon tomorrow, and I should be ok, right? At any rate, please wish me luck...
Monday, August 18, 2014
Sunday, August 17, 2014
Good couple of days
Friday, we got together with Don for breakfast at my place - it was really nice to touch bases with him again. Don is one of my oldest friends - I think I imprinted on guys wearing flannel shirts because of him, so he may be one of the reasons that Rog and I are together.
Saturday, we went to the Columbia Helicopter company picnic. It was an opportunity to introduce the newest member of our family around, and Daisy did very well - even though she's a runner, she only got away once, and she didn't really have her heart in it. We bought new harnesses for both pups for the occasion - red for Moose, purple for Daisy. The harness fit Moose much better than Daisy though - it was really more suited for his body type than hers. The search continues...
Funny bit of serendipity on the way there... we were getting the puppies settled in and trying to convince Moose that he really can't drive so he had to move out of the driver's seat. Finally got everyone settled in, turned on the car, and the radio had George Thorogood playing "Move It On Over" - Move over, little dog, a big old dog is moving in...
We had a lovely time at the picnic and Daisy was a big hit (Moose is always a big hit). Funny thing, though - Moose behaved himself like a perfect gentleman, even being calm when Roger introduced him to a bull dog while he was walking around (Moose normally does not do well with big dogs - small dogs, no problem, but big dogs tend to bring out his Napoleonic tendencies). Unfortunately, when we stopped by on the way out, Moose didn't do so well - possibly because he was on the footboard of my scooter. He tends to be braver when he's under his Mama's skirts.
On the way out of the park, we turned the corner just in time to have a doe and her two fawns amble their way across the road in front of us. All in all, a lovely visit.
Saturday, we went to the Columbia Helicopter company picnic. It was an opportunity to introduce the newest member of our family around, and Daisy did very well - even though she's a runner, she only got away once, and she didn't really have her heart in it. We bought new harnesses for both pups for the occasion - red for Moose, purple for Daisy. The harness fit Moose much better than Daisy though - it was really more suited for his body type than hers. The search continues...
Funny bit of serendipity on the way there... we were getting the puppies settled in and trying to convince Moose that he really can't drive so he had to move out of the driver's seat. Finally got everyone settled in, turned on the car, and the radio had George Thorogood playing "Move It On Over" - Move over, little dog, a big old dog is moving in...
We had a lovely time at the picnic and Daisy was a big hit (Moose is always a big hit). Funny thing, though - Moose behaved himself like a perfect gentleman, even being calm when Roger introduced him to a bull dog while he was walking around (Moose normally does not do well with big dogs - small dogs, no problem, but big dogs tend to bring out his Napoleonic tendencies). Unfortunately, when we stopped by on the way out, Moose didn't do so well - possibly because he was on the footboard of my scooter. He tends to be braver when he's under his Mama's skirts.
On the way out of the park, we turned the corner just in time to have a doe and her two fawns amble their way across the road in front of us. All in all, a lovely visit.
Monday, August 11, 2014
Thoughts on Suicide
Suicide is popping up again in my lifestream - in addition to my Facebook stream being full of Robin Williams obituaries, one of my cousins' mother-in laws also committed suicide last Friday. I've lost friends, family, a co-worker... I was even given several really bad nights by a stranger jumping off of a parking garage in Portland and landing on the street about 8 feet from me.
I used to find myself being incredibly angry at people who killed themselves - I felt (still feel) that it's one of the most selfish acts a person can commit, leaving a messy life behind for others to have to clean up. Part of that anger also might have been that I have been on the edge myself - remind me to tell you all about the pickle jar incident sometime - and stepped back, forced myself to go on when I thought there wasn't a way forward, and if I could do it, why couldn't they?
But my struggle was momentary - I'm starting to realize that other people feel that way all the time. Depression, anger, paranoia, frustration - a life with few highs and incredibly abysmal lows. If this life is all there is, why continue on with the agony? Alternately, if there is an afterlife (and considering my current situation, I'm desperately hoping there is) why not go ahead and skip to dessert, or push the reset button, or whatever metaphor applies?
Living your life solely to avoid harming others is a possible reason, but what about those who are hurting so much that they are already taking it out on those around them? What about those who feel like life is already over but the shell just won't quit? As a society, maybe we need to find a way to allow death to be a cleaner option for those who just can't continue on.
There are a lot more thoughts about this, and I find that the older I get, the more my opinion changes, but I'd like to hear other people's thoughts.
I used to find myself being incredibly angry at people who killed themselves - I felt (still feel) that it's one of the most selfish acts a person can commit, leaving a messy life behind for others to have to clean up. Part of that anger also might have been that I have been on the edge myself - remind me to tell you all about the pickle jar incident sometime - and stepped back, forced myself to go on when I thought there wasn't a way forward, and if I could do it, why couldn't they?
But my struggle was momentary - I'm starting to realize that other people feel that way all the time. Depression, anger, paranoia, frustration - a life with few highs and incredibly abysmal lows. If this life is all there is, why continue on with the agony? Alternately, if there is an afterlife (and considering my current situation, I'm desperately hoping there is) why not go ahead and skip to dessert, or push the reset button, or whatever metaphor applies?
Living your life solely to avoid harming others is a possible reason, but what about those who are hurting so much that they are already taking it out on those around them? What about those who feel like life is already over but the shell just won't quit? As a society, maybe we need to find a way to allow death to be a cleaner option for those who just can't continue on.
There are a lot more thoughts about this, and I find that the older I get, the more my opinion changes, but I'd like to hear other people's thoughts.
Saturday, August 9, 2014
Moose is playing his mama like a fiddle again
It's been a busy time for the pups - Daisy had to go to the vet yesterday (she's fine, it was just a well puppy visit), she had a spa day today, and Moose had to go to the dog equivalent of the barber for a nail trim. They're both looking lovely now (and Moose is a stealth puppy - you no longer here the clickclickclick down the hallway).
For some reason, though, Moose was acting strange after he got back from Jackie's Clip Joint. He was hiding off in the Moose Cave (a dog bed we've got stashed under the desk in the other room), wanting to go outside a lot more than usual, just generally being anti-social. I thought he might be moping about the clip, although normally he's fine with going to Jackie. He kept going down the hall to the bedroom, and I thought maybe he just needed time by himself, so I left the door open. I went to check on him a little later...
Turns out, he was down there chewing on one of Daisy's bones that he'd unearthed from god knows where. I suspect he's been sneaking around chewing on her bones all day. Little stinker.
For some reason, though, Moose was acting strange after he got back from Jackie's Clip Joint. He was hiding off in the Moose Cave (a dog bed we've got stashed under the desk in the other room), wanting to go outside a lot more than usual, just generally being anti-social. I thought he might be moping about the clip, although normally he's fine with going to Jackie. He kept going down the hall to the bedroom, and I thought maybe he just needed time by himself, so I left the door open. I went to check on him a little later...
Turns out, he was down there chewing on one of Daisy's bones that he'd unearthed from god knows where. I suspect he's been sneaking around chewing on her bones all day. Little stinker.
Friday, August 1, 2014
Ok, this one is political
In a press conference today, President Obama was talking about the declassified report on interrogations that's going to be coming out soon, and one of the things he said was "we tortured some folks". (The report is about enhanced interrogation techniques, by the way, that he had stopped when he came into office.)
I was watching Bill Maher later this evening, and there was a Republican strategist on who was offended by the fact that he used the word folks. Apparently, he felt that the word usage wasn't "presidential". No. What was not presidential (in my opinion) was using those techniques (yes, torture) in the first place. I'm a lot more comfortable with my president using colloquialisms than I am with him prosecuting wars based on shaky information.
I was watching Bill Maher later this evening, and there was a Republican strategist on who was offended by the fact that he used the word folks. Apparently, he felt that the word usage wasn't "presidential". No. What was not presidential (in my opinion) was using those techniques (yes, torture) in the first place. I'm a lot more comfortable with my president using colloquialisms than I am with him prosecuting wars based on shaky information.
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