We would like to wish you Merry Christmas
But we're not all Christians here
Hannukah would reach the same objection
What's universal this time of year?
New year! We'd like to wish you Merry New Year!
But it's not the start of the Jew's year
Or of the Chinese
It's hard as heck to be politically correct.
Guess that all that's left is Winter Solstice
Of all the others, that's the cause.
Have yourself a very Silly Solstice!
Ritually sacrifice a Santa Claus.
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